
Yesterday at my last prenatal Dr. appointment, my doctor prescribed antibiotics for whatever sick crap it is that I'm dealing with right now. The only "pills" I've taken over the course of this entire pregnancy, INCLUDING during a sinus infection and allergy season have been my prenatal vitamins and the occasional TUM for heartburn. I feel bad having to take this stupid medicine now that I'm only less than a week from delivery. I hope it doesn't create any problems. Speaking of being less than a week away, I told Jeff yesterday that it STILL doesn't seem real to me. I can't imagine the 8-10 diaper changes/day, the round-the-clock feedings, the tiny cries. I am ready as I can possibly be in the tangible sense of having all the clothes, blankets, etc. all set to go, but my brain! My brain cannot get to that ready place and it's startin' to freak me out. Why can't I wrap my head around the reality of this? Part of me wonders if it's because 3 kids PLUS the holidays PLUS the last 9 months of college courses PLUS tending to home hasn't left any time for mental preparation. Then, another part of me wonders if it is a type of defensive mechanism that my unconscious has cooked up to "protect" me from any bad news that could come. Knowing me, it is probably a pretty even dose of both of those things. It was weird leaving the dr.'s office yesterday without having to schedule a return appointment. You'd think that would've helped it sink in!? Four and a half days to go now. I think I'd like to have a night out with Jeff to talk before then. Maybe he can give me a blessing too. I'd really like that.














